Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Technical Genius

My dad moved in with his fiancé a while back and seeing as they had double of almost everything, he gave me his DSTV decoder. Yesterday I decided that I would get the thing up and connected so that I could finally start watching all my fav programmes again…

The entire sequence of events as follows:

1. Phone Customer Care to have account activated. This conversation lasts a total of 20 minutes, 5 of which was spent talking to a machine.

2.After I have been assured account is activated, I inspect decoder only to establish that darling daddy did not give me a power cable…

3. Lock up house and jump into car, rush to the shop down the road.

4.Get to the shop and am confronted with the most intellectually challenged female I have ever met *frustration increases*.
Tay: “Hi there, do you perhaps sell power cables for a Dstv decoder?”
Dumb chick: “Uh …… uh…… uh…… I fink maybe, let me check the list” **Tay smiles sweetly*
DC: “I carn’t find it by my list, let me call the manger” *Tay still smiles sweetly*

5. The manager eventually comes to my rescue and brings me the damn power cable.

6. As I am turning into the driveway at home, Hottie’s car is parked in the driveway **YAY!
He offers to cook dinner for us because I insist that I am fully capable of installing a stoooopid decoder.

7. Hottie is in the kitchen and Tay is connecting the satellite Tv – roll reversal, I think so.

8. After I am satisfied with putting all the “in” cables in the “out” sockets or whatever, I switch the Tv on in a moment of glory and …………. Nothing.

9. Hottie offers to have a look , I give him the “If you come near this decoder you will feel the wrath of Tay” stare.

10.Phone the customer care line, speak to machine for five minutes and finally a technician dude tries to assist me. He makes me change settings, pull out connections and………….nothing. After 32 minutes of chatting to customer care dude he tells me to call in a certified installer.

11. I am seriously miffed by this stage and pour myself some Vino while Hottie quietly observes from the kitchen.

12.Eventually I relent and Hottie inspects my handiwork. He finally has a brainwave and decides to change a few connections because he is convinced the previous tenant confused the cables.
TA DA….. satellite Tv is working, for about 30 seconds.

13. I again call customer care, speak to the fucking machine and finally, finally they activate my account. Voila – I have Satellite television.

My shattered nerves……


Ps# Supper was absolutely divine!


DT said...

Wow Tay - i have caught up with all your entries! Congrats on getting your own place! I am ALWAYS the one to wire the TV, DSTV and everything. It is a great feeling of accomplishment when you finally get it to work! My man wouldnt know a DSTV cable from a lap top charger!

Tay said...

Hiya DT!!

Thanks so much for the comment and for catching up on my blog - Yay!!

Must admit, I was so chuffed when it actually worked! I even did a little dance in the middle of the tv room!

Next time when you are doing all the connecting, get your man to cook supper *wink

po said...

I think the men are better off in the kitchen, don't you? I mean, they never ever read the instructions and think they know everything, which usually leads to disaster in my experience!

angel said...

so what'd he make for supper hey!? hey?

Tay said...

LOL @ Angel! He made roast chicken with the yummiest sauce (His secret recipe) and veggies! I am spoilt! Last night it was Bolognaise!